JAM Magazine: August/September 1999 Issue: Coda

by Mike Metheny

At the recent Blues & Jazz Festival, I made no secret of my high regard for our cover subject's many talents and gifts. And, I took some good-natured ribbing as a result, which inspired the following.

Top Ten Reasons I Decided Not To Ask Diana Krall Out After Her Set at the KC Blues & Jazz Festival

10) It would have seemed like I was two-timing my current squeeze, Madeline Albright.
9) I didn't want to get hit by the spray of soda water that would have come out of Diana's nose if I'd asked.
8) My new rug from Sy Sperling wasn't going to be ready by then.
7) Emergency tummy tuck surgery could not be arranged.
6) Huge zit - no Strydex.
5) My '57 Chevy was running kinda rough that night.
4) I'm still haunted by the memory of the last girl I dated named Diana (in 1966).
3) Singers and trumpet players are natural enemies dating back to the time Jean Baptiste Arban got slapped by Ethel Merman's great-grandmother.
2) I'd rather just sit alone in the dark listening to Diana's new CD, hugging the liner jacket, and quietly sobbing.

...and the Number One reason I didn't ask out Diana Krall:

1) I'm still trying to impress Jodie Foster!






	Search our site:		by Mike Metheny At the recent Blues & Jazz Festival, I made no secret of my high regard for our cover subject's many talents and gifts. And, I took some good-natured ribbing as a result, which inspired the following. Top Ten Reasons I Decided Not To Ask Diana Krall Out After Her Set at the KC Blues & Jazz Festival 10) It would have seemed like I was two-timing my current squeeze, Madeline Albright. 9) I didn't want to get hit by the spray of soda water that would have come out of Diana's nose if I'd asked. 8) My new rug from Sy Sperling wasn't going to be ready by then. 7) Emergency tummy tuck surgery could not be arranged. 6) Huge zit - no Strydex. 5) My '57 Chevy was running kinda rough that night. 4) I'm still haunted by the memory of the last girl I dated named Diana (in 1966). 3) Singers and trumpet players are natural enemies dating back to the time Jean Baptiste Arban got slapped by Ethel Merman's great-grandmother. 2) I'd rather just sit alone in the dark listening to Diana's new CD, hugging the liner jacket, and quietly sobbing. ...and the Number One reason I didn't ask out Diana Krall: 1) I'm still trying to impress Jodie Foster! RETURN TO AUGUST 1999 MAIN INDEX ------------------------------------------------------------------------ © Kansas City Jazz Ambassadors 1996-2001. All rights reserved.